Riots, looting, fire and brimstone – and that was just Charles before his morning cup of tea!

After all the drama that was unfolding outside the A1 VOX walls it was nice to be able to escape the madness and delve into the surreal world of voice over.

We had two very special guests at VOX Towers this week.

I will give you a clue to the first guest…

I'm hard yet soft, I am coloured yet clear, I am fruity and sweet, I am jelly... what am I?

Yes, the man behind the Scottish Guy character in Little Britain, Mr David Walliams, or should I say, ‘Williams’.

The funnyman had to change his name on discovering that there was already an actor of the same name in the trade union, Equity!

David is almost as well known for his incredible cross-Channel swim, which raised £1 million, as he is for co-creating and starring in Little Britain.

It was for his strong connection with Sport Relief that David found himself at A1 VOX recording an alternative speaking clock for BT, (who are one of the longest standing partners of Sport Relief).

Last year they were also the headline sponsor of The BT Sport Relief Million Pound Bike Ride.

David and the rest of his celeb fest team (Jimmy Carr, Fearne Cotton, Miranda Hart, Patrick Kielty, Davina Maccall and Russell Howard) all took part in a gruelling non-stop, four-day cycle relay from John O’Groats to Land’s End.

They raised over £1 million for Sport Relief which would see the money help transform the everyday existence of those living tough lives across the UK and the world’s poorest countries.

David says of the excruciating but worthwhile ordeal:

“It wasn’t as much as fun as I’d imagined….I had this vision of us cycling around the country, stopping off for cream teas, but that didn’t happen. We’d cycle about 30 miles at a time and I fell off three times going up Kirkstone Pass in the Lake District – I just keeled over. I’ve been in incredible pain. My tendons are sore and I’m walking a bit funny. There was a lot of chafing!!!!”

Now a star of screens both big and small, as well as a published children’s author and recipient of a Sports Personality of the Year award – it seems there’s nothing David can’t turn his hand to.

Even the ‘is he… isn’t he’ rumour mill has been quashed with his marriage to Dutch model Lara Stone last year at London’s Claridge’s hotel.

As David arrived at A1 I think we had the most people ever to grace the studio. A film crew, photographer, numerous clients and David’s personal cameraman, all clamoured to get their piece of the Walliams pie.

David was professional and polite and not at all fazed by all the comings and goings around him, even though his infamous character Andy would have seen it as ‘a bit of a kerfuffle’.

‘Computer says no’…..but luckily David said ‘yes’ and we got not one, but two, cracking photos for the A1 archives.

Britain, Britain, Britain. We've had running water for over ten years, we have a tunnel connecting us to Peru, and we invented the cat. Yeah, but No, but Yeah????

So from the character Scottish Guy to an actual Scottish guy – please step forward Mr Gregor Fisher.

Gregor is one of television’s most recognizable actors. His television career has seen him appearing in 8 series of Rab C Nesbitt, Scotch and Wry, five series of BBC 2’s Naked Video, as well as dramas such as Blood Red Roses and The Tales of Para Handy.

He is still fondly remembered as ‘The Baldy Man’ in the photo booth, having a bad hair day in the hugely successful TV advert for Hamlet cigars in the late 80’s.

Myself, Charles and Jane had a quick squizz at The Baldy Man after Gregor’s visit and the bit where the photo booth chair collapses just as the bulb goes is comic genius – so simple, and let’s face it, all of us have had some sort of nightmare in those ruddy things!

His numerous theatre credits include As You Like It, The Cherry Orchard, Juno and The Paycock and The Homecoming.

His film credits include Another Time, Another Place, 1984 (brilliant, brilliant acting!), White Mischief, Richard Curtis’s Love Actually, Merchant of Venice and most recently the long heralded remake of Lassie for Charles Sturridge.

Rab C Nesbitt however remains the main jewel in Gregor’s crown.

The string-vested Glaswegian philosopher, is the most memorable comedy character Scotland has ever produced. His countrymen celebrated him as a shambling, boozy antihero. Fisher was constantly recognized in public, although, he says drily, one of the good things about playing Rab was that a lot of people were too shy to approach him ‘in case I gave them a Glasgow kiss’.

When I told Gregor that he was the second comedy actor we had, had in that week he talked about today’s comedy and Little Britain:

“I’d better say first, in bold capital letters, that I still liked the show, but the sketches with the old woman who’s always wetting herself….that was a bit raw!”

A1 NEWS

One of A1 Vox’s longest associates, Dian Perry, was headed for her homeland, the good ole U S of A, this week when low and behold who should be there soothing any flight phobias and calming the senses?????? This is what Dian posted whilst crossing the Atlantic…Over to you Dian:

“ Listening to the 'reassuring Scottish lilt' of Charles Nove on my British Airways flight while looking at his sweet little mugshot on my screen. I particularly appreciated his back announcement of Paper Airplane by Alison Krauss - 'Don't worry, we've got you a real one'. So good!”

I couldn’t agree more Dian – Pure Radio Genius.

Many more of you on long haul BA flights should check out Charles’ monthly show – BA Easy Listening.

It’s a 90 minute A1 VOX production of music and gentle quips to ease you on your way. Groovy!

So there end’ith another A1 round up of funny men and men that soothe the soul. Next week sees the turn of the comedy female – none other than girl from the valley, Joanna Page.

Till then.. Toodle Pip all.

Albatross, birdie, bogey………..

No… this blog has nothing to do with a nasally impaired bird, but everything to do with golf!

We do like to stretch our horizons here at A1 VOX and this week saw Mr Nove out on the fairway, sharing a cuppa with none other than footballing legend, Mr Jimmy Greaves.

Jimmy Greaves is considered to be one of the finest goalscorers of his generation.

In fact he is England’s third highest international goalscorer, the highest goalscorer in the history of Tottenham Hotspur football club and more recently a successful television pundit.

They certainly don’t make em like they used to, and I doubt people will be flocking to the theatre to watch Wayne Rooney in ‘an audience with’ 30 odd years after his football career is over!!

Many of you that aren’t football fans will still probably remember Jimmy’s partnership with Ian St. John. Together they hosted a popular Saturday lunchtime football show called Saint and Greavsie from 1985 – 1992.

Greaves worked frequently for TV-am as a TV critic as well as co-hosting the popular Saturday morning kids programme, The Saturday Show. He briefly had his own talk show and has been a columnist for The Sun newspaper for many years.

In 2002 Greaves was made an Inaugural Inductee to The English Football Hall of Fame. He released his autobiography, Greavsie in 2003 and is in demand as an after-dinner speaker.

For the past twelve years Jimmy has taken part in The Jimmy Greaves Theatre Show giving the punters an insight into football drama’s both on and off the pitch. It seems, from my sources, that Jimmy is a very funny man and sends his audiences into peals of laughter proving that the guy really is in a league of his own.

Charles left A1 early doors on Tuesday morning to ensure he arrived at The Notleys Golf Club, Cressing, Essex, in plenty of time.

In what has gone down as one of the wettest weeks in July the sun shone brightly for the entrity of Charles’ visit. He even messaged me at his astonishment in the change of weather from London, and I assured him that it is always sunny in good old Essex county.

We thought Charles was to meet Jimmy at the golf course so he could record his lines for The Daily Mirror and then get on with the serious business of 'clubbing and putting' the day away. Well as it turns out not only does he play at Notleys Golf Club….he bloody well owns it!

Ah the perks of a footballers wage.

So Charles was thoroughly spoilt the whole time he was there. He said that Jimmy was incredibly nice and jovial, and that everyone at the golf club, far from being all toffee nosed and in a club clique, (as he had half expected), were very down to earth and made Charles feel at home.

In fact the only time that our Mr Nove felt threatened on his whole magical mystery tour of Essex, was when a bloke in a grey hoodie and tracksuit bottoms got on the train at Braintree, looking decidedly shifty and up to no good. Cliché much Charles?

Charles was worried for a split second as he had his laptop and recording equipment on him but the Essex guardian angels must have been looking down on him for he didn’t get mugged, no profanities came his way, and he wasn’t even spat it. A successful trip I’d say!

So the recording over Charles decided to make the most of the lovely sunshine and walk across the fields to Cressing Station. Jimmy was having none of it.

With one click of his fingers, and a nod of the head, Charles found himself on a golf buggy crusading across the green towards said station.

Now that I would have love to have seen and to quote Jimmy in his trademark catchphrase – “It’s a funny old game”

(You can catch Jimmy in his new upcoming tour with none other than Paul Gascoigne from June to November 2011. To book tickets go to www.GazzaShow.com or for VIP tickets http://www.a1sportingmemorabilia.co.uk/)

OTHER A1 NEWS

It has been a busy one and with Chris now on holiday we have the lovely Mr Ross Burman on hand to keep things ticking over in the studio.

Ross is so tall that he is officially categorised as a giant! No Joke! So if you are coming in to the studio this week make sure you go and say hello to a man that definitely knows if it's raining before anyone else does.

Until then make sure that you don't slip beneath par, and always strive to hit a hole in one.

That is me tee'ing off until next week folks.

A1 VOX is a funny old place. You go weeks without a celebrity and then just like buses three or more come along at once.

This week saw the return of Paul Barber of Full Monty fame, Stephen Tompkinson (Wild at Heart), Ashley Jenson (Ugly Betty), Jeff Brazier (Jade Goody’s ex and presenter of numerous shows) and John Woodvine (An American Werewolf in London).

So to the lady of the pack – Ashley Jenson.

Having spent a lot of time in my previous administration editing Ricky Gervais’ Extras for DVD I am more than familiar with the role that shot Ashley into TV superstardom.

Her role as the socially inept Maggie Jacobs was pure genius and Ashley portrayed the character with sheer brilliance.

She managed to bring the right amount of honesty, dizziness and warmth to the role enabling the punters at home to recoil in horror at her faux pas, giggle at her ribbing and ‘putting her foot in her mouth moments’, with Andy Millman (Ricky Gervais’), and shed a tear as her friendship with Andy is tested and questioned. That is a mighty fine combo to pull off.

To prove this point Ashley has commented that she believes comic acting is more difficult than serious drama because with comic acting you have to look not only for the truth of a line, but for the comedy in a line. In drama you’re just finding the truth in the moment, within the relationship.

[Andy and Maggie, in costume as a German refugee and a Nazi soldier, are discussing her new boyfriend between takes]

Maggie Jacobs: [quietly, embarrassed] He likes to talk dirty on the phone. He'll call me up and he's coming out with all this filth.

Andy Millman: Why... would you tell me that?

[grinning]

Andy Millman: What does he say?

Maggie Jacobs: He calls up and says things like "Ooh... what are you doing?"

Andy Millman: What do you say?

Maggie Jacobs: Well I didn't know what was going on at first - I didn't realize - and I was just honest with him and I said "Oh, I'm just cleaning out the vegetable drawer to the fridge."

Ashley received best television comedy actress and newcomer awards for her role as Maggie at the 2005 British Comedy awards. In 2006 she received two comedy awards and a BAFTA nomination, and her role in the 2007 Christmas ‘Extras’ Special earned her an Emmy Award nomination.

Extras was imported to HBO shortly after airing in the UK and became just as much of a success over the pond as it had here in good ole Blighty.

This meant that unlike Geordie lass Cheryl Cole, Ashley was accepted by the American viewers, Scottish accent and all, and landed a role as “Mode” in-house seamstress Christina McKinney on the hour long Hollywood telenovela, Ugly Betty.

Ugly Betty quickly became a hit and remains one of Ashley’s high profile roles to date.

On arriving at A1 VOX we were greeted by a very smiley Ashley Jenson and a mini me version – her 20 month old son Frankie.

What a wee angel. He was ever so good as Ashley did her thang in the booth, and was intrigued to see mummy on the screen as he sat with Chris and pointed out various things in the room to us. A very wide vocab for one so small, and probably the up shot of having a verbally minded, famous mother!

You can catch Ashley as the frog in recently released film Gnomeo and Juliet also starring, Dame Maggie Smith, Emily Blunt, James McAvoy, Jason Statham, Matt Lucas, Jim Cummings, Ozzy Osbourne, Sir Michael Caine, Sir Patrick Stewart and Stephen Merchant.

It seems this bonny lass from Dumfries has her feet firmly locked in A-List celebrity soil. But will she be polishing her Oscar anytime soon – watch this space people:

Maggie's Boyfriend: So all that stuff about your husband "polishing his Oscar", was that supposed to mean *******?

Kate Winslet: Yep.

Maggie's Boyfriend: And your basement meant?

Kate Winslet: My fanny.

Jeff Brazier cut a fine figure as he sauntered into A1 VOX suited and booted, with hair slicked to within an inch of its life.

He had been filming and presenting all day yet still made time to jump from the set to Vox Towers without seemingly breaking a sweat.

Jeff has been deeply embroiled with the world of reality celebrity. It was taking part in Channel 4 reality TV show Shipwrecked that brought the wannabe footballer into the bright lights of TV land in the first place.

His stay on a tropical island without any creature comforts was noted for a number of factional squabbles during which Jeff appeared to be an amiable and conciliatory figure. People seemed to like him and this brought presenting roles such as Simply the Best, Dirty Laundry, a reporter for OK! TV and even a Big Brother panto alongside June Sarpong.

In 2003 he appeared in Celebrity Wife Swap with his then girlfriend Jade Goody.

He and Jade had two gorgeous boys (Bobby and Freddy) whilst together and since Jade sadly lost her struggle with cervical cancer in 2009 Jeff has been raising both as a single parent.

He seems to be doing a damn good job of it too!

He has since taken the kids out of the limelight and says that his priority is to give them stability, love and plenty of time – the kind of paternal relationship he never had.

What many of you may not know is that Jeff’s own childhood was far from smooth. He never met his biological father Stephen Faldo, who was the skipper of the pleasure boat Marchioness, which sank on the River Thames in 1989 killing him and 50 others.

Jeff says:

“Through all these things that have not been ideal throughout my childhood, and certainly the incidents over the last couple of years, the way I take it is that it gives you something as a person: it makes you grow. It adds another link to your armour”.

Sounds like those two boys are very lucky indeed and will hopefully grow up grounded and much loved.

In 2006 Jeff joined the presenting team of ITV2’s I’m a Celebrity…Get me out of Here! alongside Kelly Osbourne and since 2006 to the present day he has been part of Simon Cowell's money making, winner spinner, The X Factor.

His stint on this ever popular programme has seen him reporting on final nights from the contestants homes including JLS’, as well as hosting The X Factor live tour.

He currently writes a column in the Daily Mirror every week and has regular stints on the daytime series This Morning.

So the boy from Romford done good!

So to A1 News.

This week sees Mr Stephen Critchlow opening in Loyalty at The Hampstead Theatre London starring Maxine Peake and Lloyd Owen.

Loyalty is the debut play from writer and journalist Sarah Helm, opponent of the war and wife of Tony Blair’s then Chief of Staff, Jonathan Powell.

Drawing from her own experience, she has written a uniquely informed fictionalised memoir of what it was like to share a husband with the Prime Minister at key moments in the crisis.

Aren’t you going to tell him? Are you going to tell anyone? Is anyone going to tell anyone?


Go and see our Critchy in what is sure to be a much publicised role, and controversial stage production.

For tickets, visit: http://www.hampsteadtheatre.com

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

I still haven’t managed to extract a quip of the week from Joan – I secrectly think she peaked too soon with her Fresian/P***/Thistle quote and needs time to think of something equally auspicious.

So instead we have a favourite quip from our very own Mr Nove –take it away boss:

“As much use as a one legged man in an arse kicking competition”

As Charles comments through watery eyes – “this just works on so many different levels”

Next week A1 VOX hits the road as we record legend Jimmy Greaves in his home town, which also happens to be spitting distance from my very own home, in Essex – The Motherland – good luck Charles, I know how travelling any further East of London than Shoreditch gives you a nose bleed!

Okay so before I commence, you must be informed that the person behind the keyboard is not who you are expecting.. aka, this is not Sarah…. Is it a bird? IS IT A PLANE!? No.. it’s Emili (sorry to disappoint, a plane would have been much more exciting). Im here at A1 VOX doing the lovely task of experience of the work variety!!!!!!!! (work experience just in case you didn’t catch that, hehehe). Im here for a lovely total of 5 days and this is to be my 3rd.. right in the heart of Soho (EXCITEMENT MUCH!).

First off, lets just get it clear that A1 VOX is actually in the perfect location. Apart from being spot on for all manner of voice artists to drop in and record whilst filming or rehearsing in the neighbourhood, there are also exciting streets to wander around aimlessly, and plenty of mental hair cuts and piercings to secretly stare at without being noticed.

However, the wonders of A1 VOX are not sprawn across the world that is Soho, but hidden behind the cutest little blue door, and up the stairs where all the magic happens. The stairs are counter-acted by the charming welcome at the top by the wonderful Sarah, Charles, Chris and the in-house voices (all very wonderous, talented and lovely people may I add).

I’m not gonna lie, I was expecting everyone to speak as they do on the adverts, BIG and LOUD, a world of cartoon characters stuck in human bodies, and for my voice to be shunned by the professional speakers as being the only average one in the building, but so far, everybody seems pretty..… normal, believe it or not!

The familiar voices from TV suddenly appeared when I sat in on sessions with Chris in Studio A and with the in house team in Studio B, otherwise known as the small but perfectly formed, Voxbox (don’t forget that all good things come in small packages, darlings).

Whilst here I’ve been lucky enough to pin my ears back and listen to the voicing diversity that A1 VOX produces. From a strong spoken Irishman (Peter Macdonald) to the smooth, endearing voice of Beth Chalmers, and not forgetting the unmistakable talent that is Trailer Man – Mr Redd Pepper. The quality of the microphones shocked me, don’t think I’ve ever heard a northern accent so clearly!

So yesterday beheld an awesome experience for me; you might find it a bit weird.. but this is coming from a country girl who loves the city….. I was sent on a treasure hunt to………DRUM ROLE PLEEEEASE!........ Tesco’s (DUN DUN DUUUUNNNNN). yep.. that’s right, Tesco’s. It may not be the X on everyones map, but hey, anything to help out the team here at A1 VOX…. THEY’RE AWESOME. Im positive that my wisdom of all things A1 VOX can only grow over the rest of the week, so wish me luck! Farewell, best wishes, ADIOS AMIGOS! Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ah – the lovely Emili – she is very young and has been the source of much jealousy amongst the A1 girls as we all take ourselves back to when we hadn’t even taken our GCSE’s, or the equivalent!!!!! – so thank you for making us feel so old Emili.

Joking aside she has done a grand job for someone who isn’t even old enough to vote so watch this space people as she could be the producer of the future.

So onto the A1 VOX round up.

Chris was holed up in the studio for most of last week recording a corporate piece in a multitude of languages.

After four hour stints of hard graft he would come downstairs to see the light of day, squinting and looking a little dazed and confused. On top of that he was also whisked away for an outside recording and returned to the studio to turn the project around in ball breaking time.

Well done Chris – a busy week, and as per usual, all done with good grace and a big smile. We salute you!

So just when you thought last week had exhausted the theme of ‘wedding’ another one leaps up and embraces you like a warm hug on a winters day.

This week saw the turn of Mr Mark Straker who wed the gorgeous Willow in Vienna, (which incidentally is where they first met) – AWWWWW.

This monumental occurance only happened on Thursday so hopefully we can lavish you with some decadent photos on their return. CONGRATULATIONS GUYS – may it be a wien-tastic experience!

Unfortunately I haven’t been able to nail Joan down to a ‘quip of the week’ so instead we thought we would show you a picture of Peg Leg Pru the one legged pigeon who lives outside my office window.

During a quick conflab one afternoon Peg Leg Pru had this to say about her unfortunate predicament:

“Being a pigeon in London can be a cut throat world Sarah. I have resided in Soho since I was a mere fledgling. Those heady days of my first London summer are but a distant memory now. That was when I could hop from one leg to another, balance on any wall I was to come across, and squat without fear of falling in my own feaces. Heady days indeed. Still, the benefits are pretty good, I mean look at my belly and shiny coat - beats having to peck around in the dirt all day to earn a crust!”

Straight talking, wonky walking, Pru there ladies and gentlemen.

LONDON NEWS

HARRY POTTER PREMIERE

Whether you are a follower of the books, films, both, or neither, there was no denying that last nights Harry Potter London premiere was more than a little bit special. Us Brits sure know how to pull out all the punches when it comes to auspicious occassions and this final show down was no exception.

More than eight thousand fans packed out Trafalgar Square to say goodbye to the most successful British film series of all time.

The rain held off as the cast walked the longest-ever red carpet, at nearly a mile, from Trafalgar Square up to Leicester Square.

This premiere marks the end of an era for the entire Harry Potter cast and emotions were clear to see on the night as Emma Watson and J.K Rowling shed a little tear together as they waved to the many fans who had staked out a spot to watch the action.

Film stars and celebs alike may now have seen the final instalment of the Harry Potter series, but eager fans still have a little longer to wait as the film kicks off in cinemas next Friday (July 15).

So there we have it.

I hope you all tuned in to Eastenders and caught the divine Tracy Wiles in her somewhat dour grey outfit, as Ronnie’s laywer and join me next week when I will attempt to dish the dirt from Felicity Duncan’s Wimbledon experience.

Tally-Ho!

Hello out there. We are back after our two week summer break. Have you missed us?

I was lucky enough to get the gorgeous Miss Ellie Howell and trustworthy Mr Jamie Nove to fill in for me whilst I sunned myself in Majorca, and sweated in 36 degree heat in a bridesmaid outfit! A big shout out to you guys for stepping in and keeping the fort ticking over.

So the wedding was going very well. Having had my hair and makeup done in an air conditioned room, the photographers arrived, armed with weapons of mass destruction and evil plans to bake us within an inch of our lives. They made us stand in the midday sun, by the pool, with a silver light reflector sheet to take away the glare of the sun. Brilliant for the photos I’m sure, absolute hell on the eyes!

Still we all came away relatively unscathed and no-one was so dazed that they took a one way ticket into the pool , (thus shattering the illusion of bridesmaid perfection). Phew!

So this blog is a case of three weddings and a transvestite!

May we send out big congratulations to Trevor Nichols and family who gained a daughter in law this week. Hurrah!

If you read the last blog you will know that Nick Chambers also said ‘I Do’ recently.

Everything went to plan, the sun shone, and I am happy to share a few pictures of Nick, Amy and Isaac with you right here, right now:

The happy day took place in idyllic Beer in Devon with Amy’s mum and dad living almost next door to the church – no excuses for turning up late eh Amy!

The inside of the church looked fabulous, with a nautical theme of fishing nets, buoys, oars and even a boat – more than a nod to the celebration of the seaside.

Here are the happy couple during the service.

As soon as the ceremony was over it was off to the beach for champers.

Just to up the ante they even had celebrities attending!!!! Here is Lenny Henry posing for a piccie.

I think you will agree that it looks like a splendid time was had by all. Congratulations guys – you look like you enjoyed every minute and may we wish you all the happiness for your future life together. One, two, three.......AHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Now for those of you out there who are wondering where on earth our Mr Nove is, I can now divulge that he is loitering, probably with intent, in deepest darkest Oxfordshire.

If you go to BBC Radio Oxfords website you can listen to Charles every morning from 10am – 12pm as he sits in for Malcolm Boyden.

The show is a veritable feast of Oxfordshire stories and people. I happened to catch a piece of the action today and had had a big grin on my face as Charles’ guest explained that he only eats raw food. This would be Charles’ idea of pure hell as he is a bona fide carnivore through and through.

Still - ever the professional, he quipped that the guy wouldn’t be converting him any time soon but that it all sounded marvellous especially considering it had cured the chaps chronic fatigue and depression. He followed this up with a rendition of the track ‘Hungry Eyes’ by Eric Carmen.

Intentional or not it was pure genius!

We look forward to having you back soon Charles and don’t worry Leon’s is still there for a meatball massacre on your return.

So to the racy section of this week’s Blog – Introducing Joan Walker, the sexy minx!

Last week Joan became part of soap history by treading the famous cobbles of Coronation Street.

Filming took place in the beautiful Salford Masonic Hall. Joan’s scenes were with Sue Nicholls (aka Audrey Roberts) and Andrew Hall (aka Marc/Marcia).

Audrey was introduced to Marc in the Rovers Return by rival hairdresser Claudia Colby (Rula Lenska of A1 VOX fame!).

It isn’t long before Audrey finds her head turned by the silver fox. However, as is the way in soap land, secrets never stay buried for long and soon enough the women find out about Marc’s alter-ego Marcia.

In Joan’s scene Audrey is persuaded by Marc to accompany him to a benefit-cum-fund raiser for “Cross Wires” which is a charity that supports transgender folks. It is there that they meet Joan’s character (Louise) and her husband (Phil/Phyllis). Audrey is impressed by how Louise handles the whole cross dressing issue with Louise stating that her only complaint is that she thinks 'Phyliss'“...dresses too tary. She’s worth more than that”. Otherwise Louise is as happy as a fish in water, or a man in tights!

So that is a summary of the scene itself but what tom foolery did our Joan get up to whilst the cameras weren’t rolling:

WARNING – you are now entering the world of back stage Corrie as seen through Miss Walkers eyes – If you have a dicky ticker it is probably best to skip to the end of the Blog! May I also point out that some of the names have been changed to protect....the not so innocent!

“So, the three of us get there from Granada studios in our chauffeur driven Merc. and trot to our Winnebago (honest!) then are called on set to be astonished by about 70 extras all of whom look absolutely pantomimically bizarre! My "husband", T, is a chick with a d***. He proudly told me he paid £6,000 for his boobs but still has his man bits. In real life he is gay and has a "husband" (his word) who's an electrician. T, makes porn for a living and earns lots of money. She likes to be called "her" and got very upset once at passport control when she was addressed as a man. I'd like to have witnessed that!

Some of the extras looked like Les Dawson in a frock with ill fitting wigs and badly applied make up. Others looked like a cross between Jordan and a burglar's dog in lipgloss”

Pure Genius - Our Joan does have a way with words!

Joan goes on to say that another guy/gal was proudly showing off his news breasts (well, he revealed one) that he'd just had done. This apparently was very strange to see and not remotely sexual to witness a lump of clinically placed flesh on a chest. He was happy though.

I do have to mention the last guy/gal that Joan met who was a biker in his early 60s, who rides a Harley Davidson, and belongs to PIL - Perverts in Leather!..oh and his gal name is........Dinah Rod! Just when you think you’ve heard it all eh!

I wish I could explain in more detail the stories relayed to me by Joan but both she and I would probably get into a lot of trouble so I will end it right there.

Needless to say Joan had a hilarious day. Thoroughly high spirited and enjoyable, and her and Sue Nicholls became good friends in a short space of time (TV love - bonkers, speedy world!)

Because she was on location Joan didn't get onto the cobbles but she did see a few of the regulars kicking around the green room and said that they were all lovely and chatty - Gail, Leanne, the woman who runs the factory, Roy Cropper, and Michelle Collins. Naming no names, (due to professional etiquette), but Joan did mention that one particular cast member had "a face like a Friesian licking p*** off a thistle". I'm sorry - I really am, but it was just too good to leave out! If you want to know more then you will just have to ask Joan.

The episode goes out on July 29th. Fingers crossed that all of Joan’s material is kept in as she says it was a very funny script by Jonathan Harvey.

So that concludes our round up of love, lust and leather.

Join us next week when normal service will be resumed, though I may ask Joan for a 'quip of the week' from now on, as the lady has a serious affinity with the English language!

Ey up A1 VOX bloggers!! You’re in for a right treat this week as the blog has not been written by the lovely Sarah as normal, OH NO, this is….........................

..................................WORK EXPERIENCE JACQUI here!!

I will be telling you about the life that is A1 VOX from a fresh pair of eyes!

I’m afraid A1 VOX will be stuck with me for ten whole days, so let’s hope everybody, and everything, will still be in place when I leave!

Charles set me the task of writing part of the blog from my experience to date, so here goes…

I arrived at the A1 VOX Towers on the 25th May during the process of them moving to the new office downstairs – I have been informed that the move has been taking place over many months but will be finished soon! I think it will be smashing.

The first people I was to meet were of course Charles and Sarah who are just lovely! As my first day went on I got to meet many of the in-house voices here, they are all soooo friendly and have great voices, very talented – Jealous!!! And you can’t forget Mr. Chris doing all the hard graft in studio A. His editing skills are just, well… WOW!

As the days have gone by I have heard many funny stories of the shenanigans that have happened here! You can tell it’s a great place to work and have a laugh with everybody, as well as getting some seriously top notch recordings done!

But enough of what it is like working here…

You want to know what I have been doing, except make a mark in all your hearts that will never be forgotten – I joke!  Well I’ve been covered in dust from moving things, filed papers with Sarah, listened in on studio sessions with Chris, AND he even let me do some practice editing – brilliant! Also listened in on some of the voices doing their “thang” in the good ol’ Voxbox!

Unfortunately poor Sarah was ill during the week so Charles decided to throw me in at the deep end and have me in Sarah’s position booking clients via email and… yes …answering that dreaded ringing machine, also known as “THE PHONE!”

Scary business, but after a while I think I got the hang of it and I do apologise if I scared anyone down the line, I think I was lovely and polite, or hope so anyways! 

So far there have been some great moments here, like meeting Carrie Grant when she came in to do a voice over. Her hair is still as bright red as I remember from the TV. I loved how she was doing a piece linked to the city Leeds (my hometown) and the way she pronounced “Hull” in the proper southern, correct, way as opposed to us northerners saying “’ull”!

Another highlight was receiving a lovely picture from one of the voices – Andy Stanson’s daughter, that will definitely be going on my fridge at home!

All in all it’s been a great eight days and I know I will be fully entertained by everyone in my last two. I’ll leave A1VOX laughing and smiling…and who knows if I smile sweetly enough they might even let me back?!

So thank you for putting up with me … and back to Sarah with all the in house gossip here at A1VOX…tooodles! 

Why thank you Miss Jacqui – I must admit I was a bit apprehensive about my precious Blog being hijacked but I can breathe a sigh of relief as that was a blooming delightful ditty from the gorgeous Miss Ravensdale.

I have to say that Jacqui was an absolute asset to the team during her stay, and we all loved having her around. I will put her out of her misery by declaring live on the Blog that she did indeed smile sweetly enough (and what a pair of perfect knashers they are too), and she is more than welcome back – anytime!

So from a newbie of A1 VOX to A Comedy of Errors – Mr Nick Chambers.
Hee hee – Only a reference to Nick’s upcoming performance in the Shakespearean play. He will take on the part of both Dromio’s with the Oxford Shakespeare Company from July 2nd – August 26th and will perform in The Walled Gardens of Wadham College in Oxford.

He will also be playing Algernon (affectionately known as Algy) in Oscar Wildes, The Importance of Being Ernest which will be performed, in rep, alongside The Comedy of Errors.

Blimey oh Reilly sunshine, that is a lot of Quoths, thou hasts and ‘when one is in town one amuses one selves’, to learn in a matter of weeks!

Added to this folks the young chap gets hitched this weekend to the very beautiful Amy.

You can guarantee the performance he is most nervous about is his self penned soliloquy , otherwise known as The Bridegrooms Speech!

We are sure you will smash all three performances Nick and we really hope the sun shines for you this weekend on your very special day.

May it also continue to shine on that walled garden in Oxford throughout July and August. I would give you my word that it will Nick but in the words of Dromio:

“A man may break a word with you, sir, and words are but wind, Ay, and break it in your face, so he break it not behind”.

Point Taken!

For more information, or to book tickets to see Nick’s 2 for 1 performance please go to www.oxfordshakespearecompany.co.uk or http://www.oxfordplayhouse.com/ticketsoxford/

I am off next week as I am jetting to sunny Majorca for a wedding – tis the season you know – so join me in a couple of weeks when another of our ladies hits a controversial part – no leather and whips this time but it does involve Joan Walker and a cross dressing silver fox!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Never a dull moment I tell ye!

We would just like to end by wishing Nick all the best for his big day – and I will leave you with a quote from Oscar Wildes’ Importance of being Ernest:

"I have always been of opinion that a man who desires to get married should know either everything or nothing."

Knock em dead Nicko!